"Fuck you Franco! Get an original idea!" -Scott Smith

"That's like cherries and almonds good!" -Scott Smith

"Home schooled kids always have perfect attendance." -Scott Smith

"If it weren't for porn, nobody would know how to spell 'amateur'." -Scott Smith

"You can't motorboat a woman's heart." -Scott Smith

"At least it wasn't Horshack. It should have been Barbarino. And we should all be thankful that "Boom Boom" is immortal." -Scott Smith

"I thought these films were supposed to be about a sundance." -Scott Smith

"Well, if she could keep my dick out of her mouth it would be a lot easier." -Scott Smith